Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Breastfeeding & the Family Bed

Disclaimer: Now, concerning breastfeeding, I do not mean to offend. I know that everyone comes from different places and circumstances which do not permit breastfeeding. This is purely my opinion on the matter. Take it or leave it :)

Breastfeeding has been one of the biggest joys & biggest struggles in being a mom thus far. Let me give you some background info....

Before having Ellie, I was SO set on breastfeeding. I knew that it was the simply the best for my baby. I wondered how anyone couldn't do it. It's giving your baby something so natural, so perfect, so nutritious to their tiny bones. To me, it didn't matter if I had leaky boobs (or that the one she favored would be a considerable amount bigger than the other! ha!), had to wear terrible nursing bras that were made to make no woman feel sexy, or just have the pure inconvience of always being "available" to my baby. It just felt so right. And as a matter of fact, not opinion, it IS so right. When you look at what is better for your baby, all the doctors/researchers/etc, all agree that the "breast is best".

All that to say, the first 2 months of my life after having Ellie were the absolute hardest. She just couldn't figure out how to latch on. She would cry so hard, I would pump and feed her the milk with a tiny tube that I taped to my finger, so she wouldn't get nipple confusion. Eventually after many long weeks of that, I gave in and gave her a bottle. Man did that make life easier! Meanwhile she still didn't nurse I proceeded to have SEVEN breast infections in EIGHT weeks! Talk about misery. Somewhere around when Ellie was 8 weeks, she finally latched on...I laughed, I cried, I called Adam at work, and laughed and cried all over again...it was exactly what I had been hoping and praying for! She has been a breastfeeding champ ever since then. She is now 11 months and still going strong. I love it that she is so interactive with me during the process of nursing...she will stop and smile, play with my hair, hold my hand,...bliss.

I have been reading so many articles on when to wean from breastfeeding. I definitely don't want Ellie to nurse til she's 2 or 3 by any means, but even the little I have tried weaning her doesn't seem to be sticking. And for some reason, it feels unnatural for me to just quit cold turkey. Ellie loves it! Some articles say that babies will wean when they want to, and to just let it happen naturally, but again, if that wasn't til she was 2 or 3 I think I would be a bit weirded out...I also have lots of friends whom I respect and love quit at a year and their babies seem to take to that wonderfully....hmm, decisions decisions! I have read that some mom's felt like they were robbed from sweet time with their babies when the doctor told them to quit at a year. They said that they weren't ready, and the baby didn't seem to be ready, and they really regret it. Do any of you who breastfed have any thoughts on this??? I'd love to know.

Ok, now to address the sticky part. I have heard a lot of women who either decide to not breastfeed because of the inconvenience, or they try for a couple of weeks and give up because it was "too hard". Since nursing Ellie, I have a huge passion about stuff like this. I always think, "Well, welcome to parenthood woman! It's hard. But don't you want to do the best thing for your baby?!...or is it more about you???". It just makes me wonder what the baby would say if it had a choice between momma's milk or the local formula farm. I am by no means saying that it's not hard work, and that it would be easy to give up when your nipples are raw and have sores all over them! Sheesh!!! That is some pretty terrible stuff....but just like anything else, things get better with time. So I guess my statement or rather, my challenge would be for ladies to stick it out with their babies. It's so so good for them. Or if you do wanna give up on having them on the breast, how about pumping?! As long as it's YOUR milk, you are doing wonders for that little soul! I know it's a very sensitive subject, and maybe I have it all wrong as to the reasons why most women don't do it, but I'm hoping that by posting this, my mind will be opened up and able to understand better from women who have experienced this first-hand.

P.S. Go made our bodies to produce milk, so why not use them for the purpose in which they were created? Why go against nature?!

Gollie! That was alot of writing....the Family bed will have to wait for another time. That's enough to chew on :)

Til next time,

Monday, April 26, 2010


I have pondered about my blog a lot lately. I feel it is getting a little too "fluffy". I know that family updates & pictures are always fun, but it has turned into something that Ihadn't intended it to be. Originally, I was going for honest, real life-stuff, struggles, my welcomed (or un-welcomed) opinions. I think its good for me to not know who reads my blog because it makes me scared to post things when I know who is reading...I have not posted many a-blogs because of that very reason. So, all this to say, I'm gonna start saying what on my mind. Controversial or not, I'm not gonna care...I have a right to my thoughts....right?! And I figure if people don't like it, they don't have to read it. So there you have it- my disclaimer for future entries. Consider yourselves warned, and I hope that we all remain friends after you discover the dark corners of my mind that wander aimlessly :) Tomorrows, or tonights topic if I get around to it......Breastfeeding & the Family Bed.

Wishing you all a superb Monday afternoon! Only 40 minutes til Adam gets home....Can't wait!


Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Trip to Sierra Vista

Before the traumatic events of Sunday night, we had a great visit with my brother and sister-in-law in Sierra Vista :) They just had a baby (see post below), and we wanted to go help them out! Gollie, I remember the days of being exhausted and needing just a mere 6 hours of sleep, and that being extremely hard to come by! They have got Cole on a wonderful schedule, and he is such a sweet baby! So good. He hardly cried the whole time we were there :) Ellie loved being with her cousins, and we can't wait to see the whole fam and baby Cole again!
Adam, Krystle, Cole
Ellie w/Uncle Jay Jay and Hana for storytime before bed :) Don't you love that chair?!
Us taking some after bathtime pics!
Ellie & Hana soaking it up! I seriously think the water was brown by the time they got out! Eww..so gross!
Daddy and Ellie...such a cute picture :)
Love, Krystle

Monday, April 19, 2010


"Your hopes and dreams for that little life begin the moment you know they exist."

Gosh. That was said to me in an email a few minutes ago from a very close family friend. It is exactly how I have been feeling, but I haven't been able to put it into words. I wondered with this pregnancy if there was ever even a baby, but honestly, it really doesn't matter. To me there was, and my hopes and dreams had started soaring the moment I found out. I know that there will be more pregnancies to come, but I am definitely grieving the loss of this baby. We really wanted this baby. And I know that by the time late November and early December arrives, I will be wishing that I could meet my sweet baby. I'm so grateful that I will be able to meet him/her in Heaven. That is very uplifting.

Thank you for your prayers. I can feel them helping me through this hard time :)

Love, Krystle


Well, I think (99% sure) that I had a miscarriage last night. I'm not sure why I'm blogging about it already, but my mind is just racing and I think I need to get some thoughts out. Adam and I are really sad. We really wanted this baby. I know that there will be more pregnancies to come, but we will always wonder what this one would have been like, and what kind of baby it would have been. I'm definitely grieving for my loss today, and last night and today has felt very surreal. I wish I could just take it back. I'm not mad or angry. I think that our body has a way with things, and for some reason, this one just didn't hold. But I am sad. So thankful that I have Ellie though to cheer me up...she is really good at that :) Adam also stayed home with me today and has been really supportive, loving, and encouraging. He is such a good comforter. I am still going to go to the hopital today to confirm everything...I will keep you all posted. Your prayers would be greatly appreciated right now. We have a God who gives and takes away. He is also our comforter & our shelter in our time of need. I know that through this, He will make me stronger and make some kind of good out of it. He is already at work by sending a dear friend from California (Heather!) out to me to just spend some time to just sit and hang out with me. Just so happens she has gone through this 3 times, and knows the perfect things to say (or not say) to help. I've also had so many people just sending out love and prayers through calls or texts, so thank you everyone! I will end with these verses that I'm holding in my heart right now:

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." -Philippians 4:8

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." -James 1:2-4

Love, Krystle

Friday, April 16, 2010


Random picture of my little painter ;)

I had my ultrasound today. Apparently I wasn't far along enough to see the baby or a heartbeat. I think I'm only 5 weeks along...all that was visible was a sac. Not gonna lie, it totally freaked me out. Just the mere thought that a baby could possibly not be in there is totally heartbreaking. The ultrasound techinician kept saying that at this time there is nothing to worry about and to just come back in a few weeks and we should be able to see something....I think the mom in me is what made me worried! I called my mom crying, and she said to not worry, it's totally normal to not see anything this early, and a few others confirmed the same thing also. I even typed it in on yahoo to see if others had experienced this too, and they had! Now I just need to calm down and trust in the Lord, and not get worked up over nothing! Hopefully in a few weeks, I'll have some great news and pictures of our little baby and it's little heartbeat :)

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Baby Cole

My little nephew Cole made his entrance into this world on Monday morning :) We were all SO happy to finally meet him!!! At first glance, I think he looks just like my brother....he weighed 8lbs 13oz, and was 22 inches long. Big healthy boy! I got to go to the hospital a few hours after he was born, and then later that night Adam and I went to the hospital to walk around with him so that my brother and sister-in-law could sleep....oh I remember those days of pure exhaustion! Here he is!:
Baby Cole with Auntie Krystle....I LOVE holding babies :)
Cole with his big sis Hana
Ellie & Cole
An exhausted Jay, Hana making a goofy face, and Cole
And I had to leave you with a cute picture of MY baby!
P.S. I have an ultrasound tomorrow evening to tell me how far along I am! So exciting! I'll keep ya posted :)

Friday, April 9, 2010

Then there were 4.....

I am sooooo happy to say that Ellie is going to be a big sister!!! I just found out a couple days ago that I'm pregnant! I think I'm about 5-6 weeks along, and my due date is probably around November 27th :) I have an ultrasound this week to give me an real due date though. Adam and I are SO happy and feel so blessed that the Lord has given us another life to love on! It is truly a gift. Nausea has totally set in, and I'm feeling a bit sick at the moment, but here is our life lately in pictures!

Adam and Ellie in her purple room
Isn't this the goofiest face??? She's so funny!
Ellie at the play area in the mall...she loves it!
Ok, I'm not a bad parent...Ellie loves doing stuff like this! She even gets our dogs leashes and puts them around her neck!....it sounds worse than it is! Ha ha!
Adam and I on Easter....we didn't snap any good family photos! Bummer.
New bookshelves...I love the way they fill up the corner.
My sis-in-law Amanda and I...she is past her due date and we are soo excited to meet baby Cole!
Adam, Ellie, my brother Jay, and niece Hana
Ellie & Hana....not sure why Ellie looks cross-eyed ;)
Ellie and daddy outside on the swing
Our new rug & Ellie watching her little show :)
I just LOVE this picture. This is so Ellie. Climbing on EVERYTHING all the time. She has superb balance. Not bad for a little girl!

Love, K